11 June 2010

Learning my own lessons

Well, I am now the proud mother of not 1 or 2, but 3 children. And now that Xander is 3 weeks old and has finally woken up, the real fun begins. The last few weeks have been a wonderful blur of the perfect, sleeping infant while I continue with the job of raising the 2 older girls. I am thankful God made it that way. It gave me 3 weeks to reinforce the rules with Annalia and Naomi, assuring them that Mommy still loves (and disciplines) the same, even with the new addition in the house.I had prepared myself for the girls to have a bit of a difficult time when Xander finally joined our family. Remembering Annalia's reaction to Naomi (which was great) I completely expected Annalia to transition beautifully. And I thought that my introverted little Naomi would be the one to struggle. Boy, was I ever wrong. Somehow, the presence of Xander in the house has brought Naomi out of her shell. When guest come over, she is the center of attention, talking, laughing, and just having a great time. Not to mention she is IN LOVE with her brother. Really, she can't keep her hands off him.
Annalia, on the other hand, is having a more difficult time. Don't get me wrong, she loves her brother just as much as Naomi does. She loves to hold him, get things for him, talks to him. It is adorable. But she is having a hard time adjusting to the ramifications of a 3rd kid in the house. I like to think that I am a fairly good mom, but I certainly have my faults and shortcomings. The main one being that I tend to take the path of least resistance. When Annalia wanted something, or wanted me to do something, if I could do it, I often did. I really only said no if it was going to hurt her, or if I really couldn't accommodate. I am still that same way, however the amount I can do has just decreased. She is having a hard time with this. Often throwing fits when things don't go the way she wants. I have repeatedly had to tell her "Sometimes things don't always go our way, and we just have to learn how to deal with it."
Well, she must be learning something, because just yesterday she was able to apply that lesson in a very humbling way (humbling for myself.) For the past 3 weeks, I have been very blessed to have all 3 kids down for an afternoon nap at the same time. I know - I should be on my knees thanking God right now. However, yesterday it was not to be. Naomi - who ALWAYS takes a nap - who has ALWAYS been a great sleeper - hardly ever gives me trouble in that area, decided not to take a nap. And if Naomi doesn't sleep, there is no way Annalia is going to go down. It didn't really help that I was already a little tired. I took them all downstairs, hoping they would watch a show and I could rest on the couch with Xander for 26 minutes. Lucky me, though, Naomi decides this is the perfect time to test just how much she can get away with before I drag myself off the couch to punish her.

Needless to say, I was soon in tears. I tend to throw myself a pity party when the girls miss naptime (and I miss "me-time"). Don't get me wrong, I had every right to cry and be disappointed, but I was then reminded that I could chose a better reaction. Soon, my 3-year-old is at my side, stroking my hair, saying, "Remember Mommy, sometimes things don't go the way we want, and we just have to learn how to deal with it."

From the mouth of babes - words of wisdom. And it was just what I needed.


Greg and Bre Wheeler said...

Aww honey - you're not the only one - the one thing that can make me feel upset and/or angry most is sleeplessness/exhaustion that could have been prevented had the baby slept when they usually should/would have slept... In a way, I am dreading the fall for just that reason alone (not that I dread her arrival, but you know what I mean) :) Thanks for sharing with us!

The Mazza Munchkins said...

I still have my kids go down at the same time and Frankie is almost 5 and 1/2, just because I need that hour of Maura time, and if Frankie gets up before my hour is up...I send him back!